They Say Life Boils Down to Four Bottles. ScreenDr Begs to Differ

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You may have seen this image floating around the internet and had an LOL. At the very least, you made a small noise with your mouth resembling a chuckle. But the artist left out an essential bottle of everyday life that we can’t miss. The missing bottle is ScreenDr.

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No life is complete without a bottle of ScreenDr.  Someday, ScreenDr will be as familiar as having a bottle of Coke or beer around the house.  While it is NOT meant for drinking, it is a safe cleaning solution for every device, especially in this device-driven world. Check out our updated list for some startling insight and glaringly obvious observations.

 

1.) The Baby Bottle  – (Age 0 to 4)

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An adorable young cookie monster. Or is it an Angry Bird? 

We all have to start somewhere in this great mystery called life.  It could be argued that the baby bottle sees the most use during its short time span.  As a baby, you’re either crying, making a mess in your diaper, or looking for your baby bottle.  It’s a simple time, but you realize early on that you are pretty reliant on bottles. Dependence begins. “More milk, mother! HURRY!”

 

2.) Coca Cola Bottle – (Age 5 to an awkward moment at the dentist)

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I had to google the Soda Pop Board of America out of curiosity. I was not disappointed.

After drinking baby milk and nutrient juice loses its cool, the move to sweetened sodas happens seamlessly.  While it is not advisable that you start drinking coke at the ripe age of 5 (even though many parents insisted on it when I used to be a server), it is certainly happening. The sugar and caffeine combo makes a great pick-me-up for anyone’s day. Drink coke and other sodas responsibly. Maybe make a switch to sparkling water or something when you hit age 10.

 

3.) ScreenDr Bottle – (Age 16 and up)

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The age matters a bit less with ScreenDr… there was bound to be some overlap!  Also, it should be noted that ScreenDr is NOT for drinking.  It is a water-based solution without harmful chemicals, but still, that would be pretty dumb.  The cleaning cloth, StorDry bottle, and clicking cap are not features you find with nourishing beverages.

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ScreenDr safely cleans your dirty electronics devices.  Your phone screen, laptop, keyboard, and plasma TV become unclean rather fast.  These items are used fifty times a day and are as dirty as a toilet seat.  While you’re developing a great work ethic and keeping the house clean, it’s essential to always have a bottle of ScreenDr on hand.  This safe device cleaning solution is odorless and comes with a compact cleaning cloth that can handle almost every surface or smudge.  Like Coca-Cola, once you have it around, it’s very difficult to imagine life without a trusty ScreenDr screen cleaning bottle.  This is the item that brings the four bottles image up to the much more comprehensive five item list.

 

4.) Beer Bottle – (Age 21 and beyond)

too much beer

This is what a really unfortunate amount of Coors Light looks like.

You never really move on from ScreenDr, but that’s mainly because of the fallout from drinking beer (bottle, can, or tap).  You’ll spill beers on your phone at the pub.  Friends will get mozzarella stick grease on their screens when they show you a dumb meme (like the one that inspired this article).  Earlier, I said that the baby bottle gets the most use in this list, but it’s really debatable when I look at other people’s Facebook photos of their college years and not mine.  For responsible adults, it’s the buzz that keeps on giving.

 

5.) IV Drip – (Age 50 and up, hopefully)

iv drip

Congratulations, you’ve made it to the final bottle.  It’s not as fun as ScreenDr or the champagne of beers from what I’m told, but the relief is instant.  Saline and other dehydration medicines literally drip at a controlled flow into your veins.  It’s also an exclusive privilege to try bottle five, because hospitalization is required. So it’s sort of like a VIP club.  No one is really in a rush to get to bottle five, but it’s a fact of life and it’s waiting there.  An IV drip is crucial and completes our list.

 

The Clear Winner

Life boils down to five bottles.  Always use ScreenDr in ample amounts and the rest will follow suit. ScreenDr is a guilt-free bottle you can always turn to, no matter what walk of life you find yourself in.